Embracing Your Creative Confidence: Dusty Allendorf's Journey

In this episode, Dusty Allendorf shares personal experiences on how she has grown to be more assertive over time. Highlighting her personal development and creative journey, Dusty discusses how overcoming these challenges have positively impacted her life. We also he discusses innovation in her quilting integrating laser cutting and hand dyed fabrics. 

Thanks for joining us!

Transcript

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 0:34

Welcome back to Creative Crossroads, everyone. Today, we have a special treat. Catherine and I are going to talk to a long time friend of ours, Dusty Allendorf, about her quilting process and creative, process as well. Dusty does a lot of ice dyeing, makes beautiful fabrics that she incorporates into her quilts. She uses a lot of digital technology including laser cutting and she makes really unique modern quilts. So today we'd like to find out more about how that works and what happens in her creative world. Welcome Dusty. Good to have you.

Dusty Allendorf: 1:09

Hello thank you.

Catherine Dutton: 1:12

Yeah. We are really excited to talk to you today, Dusty. So we're going to throw you a curveball and ask you to begin with what does it mean to be a creative person?

Dusty Allendorf: 1:21

I don't know,, because I come from a long family of creative, so it just I don't know, it's just always been there. I don't know any difference. It's freedom, in some ways it's, I'm not good with words. You'll learn that. So I guess it's a. Easy way to show my words.

Catherine Dutton: 1:37

Hmm.

Dusty Allendorf: 1:39

That things that might be feeling, I try to keep it on the happier side sometimes. Sentimental, but I usually try not to go too deep into things. It's just an outlet, most people put it, it's just a way to express yourself. And that's about it.

Catherine Dutton: 1:58

Okay.

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 1:58

you use a lot of words in your quilts. Your, many of your

Dusty Allendorf: 2:02

I do, but they're 99 percent of the time other people's words that have spoken to me in some way. I try to make sure I credit. Where it actually comes from sometimes if it's just some, random little blurb that shows up on your Pinterest feed, that I can't really credit them. But, yeah I do because I'm not good with it and I know it's it's not a failing of mine, but it's not my strong suit. When someone else says something that is oh, that's what I mean, then I like to take that and. Whatever it's speaking to me, then I will try to do my best to portray it. And if other people like it, great. If not, it's. Just for me,

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 2:41

I think that's great.

Catherine Dutton: 2:42

so for you, a lot of inspiration comes from quotes and sayings. Is that what we're

Dusty Allendorf: 2:47

yeah,

Catherine Dutton: 2:48

Are there other sources of inspiration? Oh, sorry.

Dusty Allendorf: 2:51

inspiration, I guess you just get it from everywhere. But, yeah, generally, if, a phrase or quote or something I read a lot. I'll jot down things periodically. That's if it makes me giggle out loud, But if it or just really speaks to me, there's 1 that I'm working on right now that the phrase was it was something that just popped up on my Pinterest and it just said, be the woman you needed when you were little. But it really spoke to me because I feel like I have not been that to my nieces. And nephew. But then it made me realize I have a nephew, so it probably should be more inclusive, so I just rephrased it to be the person you needed when you were little. And that one is really speaking to me right now and it's driving me nuts that I can't get it. Out it's, mostly mechanical issues because my laser is down. But yeah, that was more traumatic than I thought it would be

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 3:47

So can you talk a little bit about that process and like once you come up with a quote, then what you do with it, and I know you work digitally a lot, how does all that come

Dusty Allendorf: 3:58

I'm not really a good drawing artist. Per se so once the quote comes to me, I'll an image usually follows. Sometimes the reverse with the Dolly quilt, it was her 1st, then the quote but I can get into that later. But as far as this quote goes, it was just I wanted to evoke something childhood but not be boy girl. I want to be anything that anybody could associate with a child and so I felt in this case, I'm going to go with the dandelion puff. So I just really, I got on Canva and from my understanding Canva when you have the pro it's copyright. 3, but, I'll just find an image that speaks to me and then I'll go and modify it to what I feel. And then I'll have a jumping off point with that work. And then I'll just fiddle until I have the way I want the. Words to be, I'm trying to get away from the. My last few have been the words were like, in your face right there and I want this 1 to be a little bit more. Flowy, and I know it doesn't really make sense in words, but the words won't be so bold and in your face. I'm hoping the background that I've dyed will take up a lot of that negative space. And then my dandelion. Hopefully going to be flowing and everything, but I have a vision and I will once I get that finalized on if I end up drawing it on a piece of paper then I'll get it scanned in and digitized and. Then I have to break it down into pieces that will fit on my laser bed. It basically has to be a fat quarter or smaller and so I'll have to spend, a few hours, breaking the design down into its elements and then the fun part of fabric pulling and all that, then really, most of my work is away from the sewing machine once it all gets fused down and everything, the fun part starts with the quilting and, All that, but it's all fun to me. Actually, I couldn't say it's all the fun part. Almost every, I can't think of an element that I. Do that is sometimes there's some things that you just do, and there's part that you're just like, oh, no, I'm sorry binding that I hate that's the part in the process. That I dislike. But yeah, other than that, the whole process is it can sometimes come quickly few hours to a couple of days and then other times it's. Can take forever. This 1 is taking forever, but part of that's the mechanical issues.

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 6:17

And most of your fabric or all of your fabric is your hand dyed fabric?

Dusty Allendorf: 6:21

That my backgrounds are I generally go for commercial fabrics for the words and the design. Because I just I don't know. I like Basically, just have a huge stash

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 6:33

That's what I was going to ask. Do you have a big stash of hand dyes or do you dye them specifically for each quilt?

Dusty Allendorf: 6:40

As far as the background goes, no, I. I tend to, if I go in and have a plan to dye something. For a specific thing, it never works. It never comes out the way I want it. So I find it's best to just go in and I'll take a weekend and I'll just die 3 or 4 at 1 time. And then they'll just set the pile until. I decided to do something with them, or in the case of the Dolly quilt the background came 1st when it came out, it was this bright pink with some orange and fuchsias but it had horseshoes all over it. that was where that went so the background came 1st other ones my duck, it was the quote. I've just always loved Douglas Adams and everything Douglas Adams and hitchhikers guide. It just sounded fun and so that the quote came 1st and the duck actually the duck was part of it too, because I also drive a jeep. you have duct so I was like, I want to do something with a but I don't want to do a jeep. Because I couldn't figure out a way to make that fun.

Catherine Dutton: 7:41

When you encounter like a challenge in that process, how do you navigate that?

Dusty Allendorf: 7:46

I'll probably try to find it out for a little while. But then I will just it just gets the points. Okay, this is just too much. I just need to stop back away. Go work on something else. And then maybe I'll come back to it because it's of those things. Sometimes if you start doing something else you stop thinking about it. You stop worrying about it. Then it'd be like. Oh, that's how I do that, and then I can. Go back, or if I'm just not finding the right fabric for some element in it, then day I'll be in a store and there it is

Catherine Dutton: 8:15

do you have multiple projects in mind at a time or multiple projects going at a time? Or do you work on one thing and focus on it at a time?

Dusty Allendorf: 8:23

I have a projects unfinished, it's because there was an element a moment like that, where I was just like. Okay, I can't do this anymore and then I will move on to something else. I like to try to finish things now when I say finish I might have a stack to be quilted or a stack to be bound. But as far as unfinished, I try not to I will have several things in my brain going on at 1 time. But they're all just percolating back there and waiting for something to strike. And then you have other ones like this 1 that I was talking about where it's just they're and it has to come out and it's just so frustrating because I can't right now.

Catherine Dutton: 8:57

Do you keep a notebook of those projects that you have in mind or do you write them down or do you just keep them all in your head and the one that surfaces the most is the one you go to.

Dusty Allendorf: 9:07

a little both. I actually have several notebooks.

Catherine Dutton: 9:11

Okay.

Dusty Allendorf: 9:12

Almost in reach at any given time. I carry 1 around with me in my bag and I'll just find random notes sometimes laying around. There was a scrap. I found the other day that said, normal is a setting on a washing machine and I don't know where that came from. I don't remember writing it down. It's clearly my handwriting, but it was just this random little scrap of paper that it's still sitting over there somewhere because I didn't want to throw it away because it meant something at some point. And maybe something will come and the other times they just nothing ever happens. day. I'll go through and look at the notebook and be like, what in the world was I thinking?

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 9:46

Have you always been creative like this? Do you remember having things that you needed to get out as a child that you used creativity? Or when did that evolve?

Dusty Allendorf: 9:58

looking back on it. Yes. In the moment. I did not know that's what was going on. I not to get too personal. I had a. Rough childhood. And I know I used to spend a lot of nights at my grandmother's house. She lived next door up in her sewing room. And when I think back on it now, I was there to get away from what was going on in my house. And it was just the way I don't, and I just, it was act back then, I was doing close. I thought I would be an amazing fashion designer one day. Life took over. I discovered quilting and here we are.

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 10:29

And how long ago was that that you discovered quilting?

Dusty Allendorf: 10:32

What do we got probably 8, 9 years. I'd say I discovered it about a year after that local quilt shop. It opened and McKinney and now they're closed. And I think they've been closed for over a year now. So I guess probably about 10 years. Nobody in my family quilted. I didn't really know it was a thing until in my mind, I knew what quilts were, but in my mind, they were the traditional things, the Amish, those sorts of things that was in my brain. I was going through a rough time and sewing with clothes just wasn't doing anything for me. My husband said I was obsessing and I need to find something else. So I just got on an old website, Meet Up and was trying to find sewing groups and quilting groups started coming up. I'm like, okay what is this? And after it's lots of online stuff, the websites, the tutorials, all the free stuff out there. I found Dallas modern quilt guild. And went to their meetups and after talking to some of the ladies that It was so far for me being up where I live and they're like, Oh, you got to check out this quilt shop. And that's how I found Stitched with love. And it just all snowballed from there. And I've never really gone back to clothes unless there was some sort of Halloween costume or something somebody needed, but

Catherine Dutton: 11:51

for you, quilting was a better creative outlet. Whereas sewing was more of a functional outlet

Dusty Allendorf: 11:58

yeah, I guess that is a good way to put it. I hadn't thought about it that way, but, yeah, because I've evolved and that's what we all have and discovered what I like and don't like I still enjoy piecing and I like to do other people that have already done all the math their patterns. Those I enjoy doing. It's mindless. I can just. Do it and have something productive when I hit a challenge, that is something I would break away and do. I'll just set whatever I was working off and then I'll go find something beautiful that somebody else wanted to do. That will just be a mindless bit of, and I don't mean mindless in a bad way. It's just they've already done all the work for me.

Catherine Dutton: 12:31

I feel like sometimes those are almost meditative projects where I can sit and it's just the same action over and over and over again. you're not putting all your creative juices into it so you can let them brew for later. Right.

Dusty Allendorf: 12:43

Yes, that is exactly right. And it's still fun to pick out fabrics and everything. And when you ask about, messiness and the creative process, I find that a little bit stressful sometimes because I try to overthink is this color going to go with this.

Catherine Dutton: 12:56

so when you say you find it stressful, is it the picking the fabrics or the potential messiness that comes with picking fabrics?

Dusty Allendorf: 13:04

I was going to say the colors and stuff, but yeah, I really don't care for the mess. Yeah,

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 13:10

the space you create in, is it like neat and tidy or?

Dusty Allendorf: 13:15

everything's in its place. It's not like color coordinated or anything like that. When you do your reorganization, you try to set it up that way, but it never stays but yeah, no, it's I got a pile, right? I got a piece of backing over here. This nightly folded up my quilt. I'm working on is hanging over the long arm. And yeah, my table is fairly clean.

Catherine Dutton: 13:36

So it's a tidy functional space.

Dusty Allendorf: 13:39

Yeah, it can get messy but I generally try to before I start something new, clean up the old mess. And then I'll start on the next thing. I don't like to have, because I'll get confused or I'll grab. A piece of fabric that was meant for something else and like things in their piles. It's an organized pile, It's a piling systems.

Catherine Dutton: 13:58

You know what? If it works, that's what matters.

Dusty Allendorf: 14:00

I've seen other people's rooms where it just is chaos in my mind, but it works for them.

Catherine Dutton: 14:05

before we started recording, we were talking a little bit about collaboration and how you're not a big collaborator with other people, except for your husband. Can you talk a little bit about

Dusty Allendorf: 14:14

And I don't mean to say that I don't collaborate. I have done projects with, the guild and stuff like that, but I just. I don't work well with others and by that, it's not that I'm, defensive or anything like that. I just tend to let other people take over and I feel like I get lost somehow. As I've gotten older, there's a lot of ways that I have, been able to be more assertive and things, for whatever reason, I always feel like some sort of inferiority complex that the other person knows more or the other person is better. And so let's just do what they want to do.

Catherine Dutton: 14:48

In academia, we call that imposter syndrome.

Dusty Allendorf: 14:53

they must have been doing a, even though they may have only been quilting for 5 years or 2 years, but they're so much more confident at it and they're so much more. This is my vision. This is what I want. I'm like, okay, that's all right. Let's just go with that. and, so I don't really offer up help with collaboration things. I need to get better. And probably I would get better if I would do it more often. And maybe that's something to try to focus on a little bit down the road, but.

Catherine Dutton: 15:18

you want to, I think that's one of those things that's like, if that's not your style, that's okay.

Dusty Allendorf: 15:24

Yeah, but I appreciate so much of what other people do that. I think you can learn a lot. In collaborating Learn from other people and see their loveliness and everything.

Catherine Dutton: 15:36

it almost makes me think we might look at different types of collaboration, collaborating on the same quilt, but also like, I think even when we sew together, when we're on retreat together, we have a sew day together, those still become collaborative moments, even though we're not working on each other's quilt, oftentimes we'll ask each other for feedback.

Dusty Allendorf: 15:53

That is so I am good at that.

Catherine Dutton: 15:56

You are like I've seen that on days when we've sewn together I've seen that with you. You're so good at providing feedback to others and you know oh like what if you did this or you've inspired me with you've given me so many color combination ideas over the years

Dusty Allendorf: 16:11

yeah I hadn't thought about collaboration and that way in my mind. It was, as you were saying, as a specific project. Working Yeah,'cause I just I had a very unproductive retreat a couple weeks back. I had only brought one project with me because I was determined that was what I was going to get done. And I knew if I brought anything else it was not gonna get done. And it just wasn't working.

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 16:34

So what do you do when you're uninspired? what can help you get back on track or do you totally shift gears?

Dusty Allendorf: 16:42

The retreat center had a store we went over there. I bought all the supplies. What's the pattern? Just so that I could have something productive done. And that gave me a little bit of okay, this was not as enjoyable as is to be with friends and to hang out and do the, I was there to also get something done. And that let go of a lot of. Just I wouldn't call it anxiety necessarily, because it's not like I had to get it done kind of thing. It's just a personal project. It wasn't anything for anybody or anything like that. But it's just you feel like, why couldn't I get anything done? so that it just, as we're saying, just the monotonous sewing of somebody else's pattern that had already done all the math, all the work. It was just like, I could just sit there. And so and talk, you I didn't have to because the project I had brought was foundation paper facing and so it was labor intensive and you had to focus and doing that other project. Was actually a better plan because I was able to just so and talk and we bounced back ideas. Was working on a swap item. And so I would just glance up and help her do her thing. And then she'd go back to her thing. And, it's freedom. done 1 or 2 commissions for friends and that was fine because I knew the people I knew they were pretty free flowing and wouldn't be all sticklers for things and would let me do what I wanted to do. And so those worked out fine. But generally. I prefer just to work on what speaks to me and what I want to do. And then if someone likes it, and they want it, or I find it interesting. A lot of times I will find a pattern or something. I wanted to do and have no idea of anybody in my mind. But at some point during the process, all of a sudden. It'd be like, oh, my God, this will be perfect for Kim, or this will be perfect for Alyssa And then I get more motivated to finally get it finished because I have someone they can go to. But, then I also have a pile that I keep waiting and I've had occasion where it's worked out that because I've had that pile. That person came to me in my mind and heart that I would be perfect for this.

Catherine Dutton: 19:01

Mm-Hmm.

Dusty Allendorf: 19:01

And so I know one day they'll all be gone. I will find a home for all of them. And when you find a home for a quilt, you have to just let it go and hope it is appreciated for what it is.

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 19:16

Do you ever have a lapse like in between projects where you don't have anything creative that you're working on? Or is there always something?

Dusty Allendorf: 19:25

It's been a long time since it's been a lapse. But, yeah, I could see generally, it's because I'm out of town or something, but it's going on in my brain. We don't have kids. It's just my husband and I and our birds. And so I have a lot of free time when not working. So it's easy for me to just pop up in what used to be the media room was turned into my sewing room and just, Do whatever I want to work on sometimes I just sit here and watch TV, but I'm in my room

Catherine Dutton: 19:56

What do you think has shaped your current approach to creativity the most?

Dusty Allendorf: 20:01

Age.

Catherine Dutton: 20:02

Ooh. How?

Dusty Allendorf: 20:03

It's I just, as I've gotten older, I've learned more about myself. I mean, Everybody talks about being in your 40s and that being the time that women find themselves and stuff like that, I I guess it was true for me. It was like, Once I got to my mid 40s and now late 40s I can look back on other projects that I did years. I'm like, oh, that is so not me. And I really didn't realize other people in the guild pointed out that I had a style. I didn't think I really did. And Sarah 1 day, she's like, oh, no, I can see when you've done something if it's yours. That was before I was even appliqueing a lot and doing what I call my giant art quilts. It's funny how sometimes other people see something in you more than you do because I didn't until she said that and it snowballed. It's okay, maybe I do have a voice. Maybe I do have and I started paying more attention to what I was doing and the things I was drawn to.

Catherine Dutton: 21:01

Mm-Hmm.

Dusty Allendorf: 21:02

And then for instance. A couple of months back the guild was wanting to do that talk on technology. And it didn't even cross my mind that I would have anything to say. It was Chris who was sitting at the same table with me that it's you should totally talk. And then it's just snowballed. And I was like, I do use this and this, I spend more time at my computer and I spend actually on the quilting process.

Catherine Dutton: 21:26

I love the idea that it's so important for us to articulate to other people what we're seeing in them, because sometimes like you said it's hard for us to, to see that in ourselves. But when we hear someone else tell us that.

Dusty Allendorf: 21:43

And I have tried to get better about doing that for others. there's been many times in my life that someone has given me some sort of positive comments and I get so uncomfortable with those and I get very, I just freeze up and it's just okay, thank you. That's why I think this whole be the person you needed is speaking to me right now, because I feel like there's so many people in the world that I think we would be, and I don't mean to get all, deep, but just random things on TV or people I bump into, I'm like. If they could just have someone that told them they were special that they were, great at something, and, I worry that I didn't do that for my nieces and nephew and just random strangers. I think it's sad that we took more import on what a random stranger says. What someone that really knows you says, but it does matter. Somebody says, oh, you have a beautiful smile. Oh, I love that dress. it does something.

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 22:40

You mentioned your technology talk and someone pointing out that that was something you were really strong at and I was there for that talk when you shared, and it was fascinating to me because so many of the things you do and the ways you explore through technology are so foreign to me, and part of it is my age, that I didn't grow up with all this technology, you know, I came to it very late in the party. So I'm still a graph paper and pencil girl, but I learned so much from listening to you talk about the ways you explore using technology and the ways you create with technology. And it's great to share those things with other people. That's how we all learn and grow. I think

Dusty Allendorf: 23:22

Yeah. I like with Catherine's AI stuff that she plays with. Sometimes I really wanted to try to get her take on that part of the technology for that talk, but could never get it because I just, I think that would be fascinating to try to do what I do and see what the AI could do, but it just takes so much time that none of us, hard to find that sit down and.

Catherine Dutton: 23:42

there are only so many hours in the day and we have to decide how we use them,

Dusty Allendorf: 23:47

my husband was saying something the other Well, If you want to if you don't sleep, you can

Catherine Dutton: 23:52

Wouldn't it be lovely if our bodies didn't need to sleep or eat or go to the Like so much time would be saved every day. Well Dusty, I've really enjoyed chatting with you. you think about like sharing with our listeners, do you have any things that you're reading or listening to podcasts or social media accounts that inspire you

Dusty Allendorf: 24:11

As I mentioned several times, just the random algorithm on Pinterest tends to know what I'm looking for a lot of times. which is scary, But, it's still fun. But, Yeah. as far as I listen a lot of true crime. I need things that I don't have to invest in, so to speak, that if I miss a few sentences, I'm not going to. Be like, oh, where am I? So my audio books tend to be very horror, sci fi, those types of genres if I'm reading and watching I want to be somewhere else not. But, yeah the zombie fallout series. I know zombies are Overdone nowadays, but I still obsess over them. That 1 is a wonderful and actually Mark 2 foes entire world. He has they're all interconnected and they range everything from the zombies to the aliens. It's a fascinating read. If you are into that

Catherine Dutton: 25:01

Okay. You talking about zombies, I just have to bring up like one of my favorite quilts that you have ever made is your zombie bunny quilt. Oh my gosh, like that was the moment. When I saw that quilt, I was like, this woman is a creative genius

Dusty Allendorf: 25:17

that actually was probably a very big stepping off point. Making things my own.

Catherine Dutton: 25:23

Yeah. You took this really cutesy pattern that was really sweet. And you turned those cute Easter buddies into zombies. And it was magical.

Dusty Allendorf: 25:34

I do love that. As much as her patterns drive me nuts, cause there's so many tiny pieces.

Catherine Dutton: 25:39

Yeah. An Elizabeth Hartman pattern is. a say that. But they're very well written, which I love.

Dusty Allendorf: 25:44

I love them. I have several that are in a to do one day.

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 25:50

I have the rest. I have the ones you don't have. I have all of them.

Catherine Dutton: 25:54

Yeah, I have several of them too. They're fun to make.

Dusty Allendorf: 25:57

they are. And once you get all the pieces cut and all the pieces done, if you're not modifying it to the ends of the earth, like I did with the zombie one. But that was a fun one. I still have that one.

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 26:08

Are there any more quilts in your future using those themes?

Dusty Allendorf: 26:12

Yes, in my brain actually, there was 1 that I just did. so I wanted to play with it's not called resist dying. It's where you remove the color I can't remember there is a word for it, but it's not coming to me. So I did a black quilt backing, and I use this stuff called out white. If you've never used it, it is amazing. You have to do it outside. It's a powder and you sprinkle it on and then you hit it with hot water and it removes the black I used the Moda Bella super black and apparently that has a red undertone.

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 26:44

Interesting.

Dusty Allendorf: 26:45

love this 1 when you do it. Just right, it turns purple.

Catherine Dutton: 26:48

Fun.

Dusty Allendorf: 26:50

But anyway, what I'm getting at, with the zombie 1, the 1st time I use the out white. I get a little overboard and so that 1 turn this really weird background. I came and describe it. It's like this weird purpley, gray post apocalyptic looking thing. So, yeah, I really want to do something down that vein, but it just hasn't come to me yet. So that has been folded up and put in a little pile for, the right image that comes along

Catherine Dutton: 27:16

I'm excited to see what you come up with. Dusty, I have really enjoyed chatting with you today. Thank you so much for joining us on the podcast

Ellyn Zinsmeister: 27:24

Thanks for sharing with us.

Dusty Allendorf: 27:25

thank you. Bye.